Fred Claus

Review by Anthony Morris

Money can't buy you love, but throw enough of it at the screen and you can buy a certain level of bland competence similar to a fast food burger.

You know it's never going to be really good, but neither is it going to be a complete mess - and when you buy a ticket to Fred Claus it's almost certain that it's that vague assurance of a minimum level of quality that's drawn you in.

After all, why else would you go to see a movie where Vince Vaughn plays Fred Claus, the seedy brother of Santa (Paul Giamatti)? 

Vince Vaughn fans aren't exactly the Santa crowd, and while they'll probably get a few chuckles out of the early scenes where Vaughn's clearly been told to riff like crazy, as the sugar-sweet plot slowly tightens (to get the money for his Off-Track Betting agency, Fred agrees to work for his brother just as a creepy efficiency expert, Kevin Spacey, turns up to shut Santa down - and don't even bother asking who has the authority to shut down Santa because this film doesn't have the answer) even Vaughn's considerable charm drains away. 

At close to two hours this hits every single Christmas cliche going, from a last-minute dash to save Christmas and a Christmas-hating villain whose icy heart eventually melts right down to a cute orphan who learns to believe in Santa again. And then it makes up some new ones, including an elf who wants to score with Santa's hot (and human-sized) assistant and Ludacris as a elf DJ who only plays "Here Comes Santa Claus". 

There's just enough going on here to keep things watchable - even Rachel Weisz has a throwaway role as Fred's girlfriend - but apart from one funny moment at a 'Siblings Anonymous' meeting populated by Frank Stallone, Stephen Baldwin and Bill Clinton's brother (which is only funny because they're in it) pretty much all the jokes fizzle out, the heart-warming moments are closer to stomach-churning, and everything else is completely forgettable. 

It's a well-wrapped box with nothing inside: if that's your idea of a good present, then all your Christmases have come at once.

2 out of 5

Fred Claus
Australian release: 15th November, 2007
Cast: Vince Vaughn, Paul Giamatti, Miranda Richardson
Director: David Dobkin
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