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UKM: The Ultimate Killing Machine
is the sort of faded cover 1980's B-Grade horror flick which you used
to see sitting on the shelf at Video Busters (a store, which in this
era of DVD, probably is in need of a name change). The sort of flick
which you see next to titles like "Brainmelter", "Zombie Corpse
Eaters", "House of Death" or any of the early Hellraiser's
- flicks with great covers (the best of which were embossed) that you
always promised yourself that you'd "Get next time" - but never did.
The
flick follows a group of slackers who decide to join the army (for a
variety of reasons, from Drug Addictions to avoiding jail time) as it
appears to be their best option. But when they realize that they are
part of a group that have been thrown into a medical experiment
facility (with a doctor who plans on turning them into ultimate army
soldier killing machines), they must fight to destroy his other
creations and save themselves.
Granted, the film was made on a
pretty tight $5 million budget. But when you compare that to the
types of B-Grade horror flicks it's trying to emulate which were made
for a fifth of the price tag (think Shocker meets Friday The 13th meets The Toxic Avenger) UKM just came off looking....well, too cheap.
Besides the odd head explosion, ripped off face or drill to the skull, UKM
just lacked the out and out scare & gore which you really are
expecting. And I'm not talking about that stupid torture violence which
Hostel has made so popular -
I'm talking ridiculous ultra violence. The sort of violence that just
makes you laugh (I recall one of the later Toxic Avenger movies in which a guys head is "rewound" in a VHS machine).
It just seems that director, David Mitchell (or the studio behind UKM),
just went into the editing room a little half arsed - especially
considering the straight to DVD market is a great deal more lenient for
"Unrated" versions of flicks these days.
If anything, it seems
that most of the budget has gone straight into Madsen's back pocket -
because there was certainly no cash spent on the remainder of the cast.
It was like the local high school had been mined of all it's Year 10
Drama class students. And while these sort of flicks don't demand a
great deal of acting ability (heck, Jennifer Love Hewitt made a fine career of it) the 'stars' of UKM just seemed to think they were part of another episode of Are You Afraid Of The Dark or Goosebumps.
The Ultimate Killing Machine
is hardly the best Friday night horror vid you'll ever see, but let's
face it, it will probably never be taken off the shelf. Resting for the
remainder of time alongside the fantastic cover-unrented gems of the
1980's. EXTRAS
While
we only recieved the preview disc (which contained no extras to speak
of besides a few trailers), one can't imagine there would be much
included for the commerical market.
Do we really need a commentary telling us the film was shot in the directors mum's back shed?
Conclusion:
Movie 40% Extras: N/A
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