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You've surprised no-one Popey

Well, good old Il Papa has once again done the Christian world proud with his latest venture into morality.

Yup, Christmas is running towards us faster than Santa's heartrate and old Popey has given an early pressie to several priests by stopping them being punished for sexually abusing kids.

Just how the old guy can explain his actions in preventing the perverted scumbags being sacked, prosecuted and then copping a damn good rogering of their own in prison is anybody's guess.

However, I did manage to plant a bug in Popey's meeting room and caught this snippet of conversation.

"Oh dear, chaps, what have you done?"

"Oh, we've been a tad naughty with a few choirboys Il Papa, can you forgive us?"

"Say a couple of Hail Marys, change your underpants and that will be fine chaps."

"Oh, Il Papa, you are such a good man. Want to come round for a party tonight?"

"Love to, but I'm meeting Santa and I want to be in the best shape I can for the old codger."

"We've got lots of malt whisky crated in ... and we've got special entertainment flown in from some poor Third World country we've forgotten the name of, but it should be a good time."

"Wellllll, I do like the sound of the malt - oh, sod Santa."

"Ooooooh, can we Il Papa?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

And that would be right. Until perverts who prey on children are seriously punished for their horrendous crimes - and I'll repeat my offer to execute them myself - then they will keep offending.

The Catholic church has to get off its arse (sorry, poor choice of words) and deal with the scumbag priests who molest youngsters and then hide behind the rather-fetching skirts of religion.

Is the main reason for the church's existence helping the poor and needy - as it so often squawks at governments - or is it just keeping the secret boys' club closed to any inspection that may open a fair few cans of worms.

It's time, Popey old fruit, that you got your act together and dealt decisively with the appalling behaviour of many of your allegedly god-fearing priests. If you don't, then I hope that you get relegated to place down below and enjoy a bit of hot-tubbing with Old Nick.

If there is something that has really got up your nose, let Grumpy Old Coot know at grumpy@webwombat.com