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Preachy Abbott needs sense - and humour

You know there are folks who can tell jokes and be funny - and those that can't. Personally, I'm no great jokes teller.

The main reason is that in order to carry a joke well, you need the accents (which I'm good at), good timing (ditto) and an ability to make people believe in the situation you are telling about.

That's where my skills in the jokes department fall over a bit. Well, fall out really, because at the pen-ultimate moment of a beautifully recounted mirthful tale - I often find my false teeth tend to go flying. This, of course, ruins the whole thing. Oh well, one day I'll get it right.

And maybe, one day, Tony Abbott - one of the federal government's hard men - will cotton on to the fact that while his name is connected with a couple of great comedians (Costello being the other), he should shy away from the attempts at humour and stick to his scripts.

Why should I be giving this advice? Well, it seems Workplace Relations Minister Abbott was preaching adlib to a conference yesterday when he suggested that bad bosses should be given a bit of lee-way and be compared with bad fathers or bad husbands.

Initially I thought there may have been some weight to the point he was making, but within seconds ruled that out. It was a very silly thing to say.

I have seen some horrendous fathers/husbands around - and heard tales that would make your hair curl. Snoring, not being able to let go of the remote-controls, shaving when the basin's just been cleaned and, of course, not putting the seat up.

I won't go into other things that bad hubbies/fathers can get up to such as drunkeness, abuse, beatings, gambling, or womanising or both.

Now according to the Abbott: "If we're honest, most of us would accept that a bad boss is a little like a bad father or a bad husband. Notwithstanding all of his faults you find he tends to do more good than harm. He might be a bad boss but at least he's employing someone ..."

Hey, Abbott! You can't really believe that can you?

Australia has some appalling bosses who use their power over employees - that is put up or get another job - to make up for lack of appendages, or height, or morals.

How about the people who set up twin companies and employ through one while keeping the assets in the other. When it comes to closing up shop there are no assets to may people's outstanding entitlements.

Or the types who pressure employees into a bit of hanky panky otherwise they'll lose their jobs.

Or the bosses - of which this nation is jammed packed - who reckon that because you sell your services to them for 37.5 hours a week (paid, that is) they can tell you what to do in your private life.

But do know what really steams me up about the Abbott's comments. I'll tell you, it pisses me off because he has me damn well sounding like a pinko!

If there is something that has really got up your nose, let Grumpy Old Coot know at grumpy@webwombat.com