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I can prove Warney's no drug cheat

Troubled cricketer Shane Warne is regarded by many as a duffer and a bit of a larrakin, however, this latest episode goes against character.

Okay he loves a party (don't we all), likes waving cricket stumps and dancing at prestigious English cricket grounds, and has a penchant for using the phone a lot, but is he a drug cheat?

Warne's a tough competitor, hates to lose, demands a lot of others and himself and there is an arrogance born of his sensational skills at bowling leg-spinners.

He has taken 491 Test wickets and, if continues to play, could become the world's highest Test-wicket taker.

Warne has been flattened by injury, but has showed guts and determination to fight back and he entered the current World Cup in the best shape he's been in for a very long time.

And it is this gutsy love for a battle that would cast doubt upon him cheating to get back into the game through taking banned drugs.

Also, the guy would be risking so much if he did so. Apart from his good name as a bowler, he could lose endorsements, advertising deals, commentating jobs - a whole slew of post-cricket money-making activities.

There's another reason I don't believe he would have deliberately taken drugs and there's a bit of a confession here.

I was up in Sydney in January to see the sights and watch a bit of cricket and I happened to meet Shane Warne and the Australian boys at a milk bar by the harbour.

Settling in with a milkshake or two, Warney told me of his deep appreciation for this column (I fair glowed with pride), although added there were times that he really had no idea what I was talking about.

This made me glow even redder - although I have to say I was a bit relieved at the inference.

Anyway, I had a bit of a runny nose and was taking some tablets to sort of dry everything up.

Not being a great fan of swallowing pills I'd actually put it into my milkshake to digest it that way.

Somehow ... and I don't know how, Warney accidentally picked up my 'shake and took a big gulp out of it.

Well how was I to know that the leg-spin great was going to nick my drink?

It wasn't my fault the drink contained a substance banned for atheletes!

Ring, ring, ringgg, ringggg, ringgggg ... Hang on.

"Hello? ... oh, it's you Shane ... mmmmmmm ... okay ... you'll be round later? ... for a little chat ... righto..."

Bye folks, gotta go. I have to see if I can get a fast train to Perth. Don't tell anybody I've gone and I'd better lay low for a day or two.

If there is something that has really got up your nose, let Grumpy Old Coot know at grumpy@webwombat.com