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A Funny Thing Happened ...

Grumpy Old Coot politically incorrect social commentator and humourist

Now for those of you out there who get offended by thoughts of ancient arms and legs entwined in lustful embraces, now may be the time to turn away.

For the issue of fogie sex has appeared in Queensland where a Brisbane brothel is offering discounts for pensioners.

Yup, in the state of former rugby league greatness it seems that the warmer weather keeps the old folks blood up and ... well ... interested shall we say.

Anyway the brothel owner reckons we oldies deserve some consideration in retirement and so there is a five per cent discount between 6am and midnight on Sundays.

Seems like Sunday could be a sacred day after all!

********

Talk about it hitting the fan. A Californian chappie has wiped the courtroom floor with a US airline after it bombed his boat with frozen toilet waste.

The poor guy was asleep in his boat when all of a sudden fist-sixed chunks of frozen sewage pelted his 12-metre cruiser.

Not only did it ruin his sleep - he was not best pleased with having to wipe up the mess.

For the first time in US legal history the court agreed it was the airline's fault and ordered the company to pay almost $5000 in compensation.

Needless to say American Airlines bosses were a bit shitty over the faecal matter.

********

Local stockbroking hero Rene Rivkin - he who is too sick for weekend jail - is having more than a few health problems.

Not only does he have Nervosia Collapsia and an infected eye, but he also seems to have needed a brain scan.

Don't worry dear readers, he came through it okay and the medicos reported officially that 'yes - he has a brain'.

Wonderful news!

********

A bit of bad luck here for a 73-year-old Japanese runner in a South African ultramarathon.

Half-way through the 89-kilometre endurance test he was set upon by a couple of muggers and had his runners nicked.

Now while I can sympathise with the old fellow it has to be said that losing your runners is nowhere near as bad as being given a necklace by robbers. (In South Africa they kill people by putting a tyre necklace around a person's head and setting it alight.)

********

And to finish how about this for a tasteless, trying-too-hard-to-be-funny headline in The Melbourne Age.

On a report about one in four women being physically abused the header was "1 in 4 young women hit by violence".

Talk about crudely stating the bleeding obvious - must be a frontrunner for a Walkley Award.

 

Grumpy Old Coot has a warped view of life, check him out

If there is something that has really got up your nose, let Grumpy Old Coot know at grumpy@webwombat.com

 

 

 
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