Alfie

Review by Stephanie Rockrohr

The story of a pretty-boy womaniser. It’s not a new idea.

Spurred by the instant success of James Bond 007, the 1960’s ran rampant with tales of beautiful, charming men. They knew where they were going, they knew what they wanted, and they loved their women. It’s no surprise then that along came Alfie.

A movie about just that, a charming womaniser who has more sex drive than conscience.

The only real difference between this and the original Michael Caine headliner is that this eliminates many of the unnecessary, confusing, and less-than-politically-correct scenes of its parent film. The storyline, however, still lacks any type of growth.

Alfie (played by the “I'll-sit-through-anything-if-he's-in-it” beautiful Jude Law) is a pretty-boy womaniser who will say or do just about anything to get into a woman’s pants, or if she’s not his type, get her to clean his apartment.

He’s come to Manhattan from England to pursue his business goals, a thing that never actually happens, and to chase women. He is our narrator on his various sexual adventures throughout the city.

As our story begins, Alfie loses his (by all essential aspects) girlfriend (Marisa Tomei) when she finds the underwear of his married mistress (Jane Krakowski) in her garbage can. He leaves her apartment, more upset at the loss of free home-cooked meals than the actual woman who makes them, (“she's lacking those superficial qualities that are important”) and carries on his merry way.

Alfie runs into a hitch when he impregnates his best friend’s fiancé (Nia Long) and has a brief run in with death involving a lump in his penis. Several non-committal and one-sided relationships later, he finally falls for an older woman (Susan Sarandon) who turns out to be just like him.

She ultimately breaks his heart (or hurts his ego, you’re never actually sure) and he finds himself questioning the very ideals he’s based his life around.

In the end, though, the character remains virtually static with no real reconciliation with his faults and shortcomings and no change of behaviour in sight. He leaves in his wake a trail of partial story lines and incomplete character developments, finally posing the question “What’s it all about?” and walks away. Cue closing credits.

You can’t fault the actors, however. Jude Law delivers a cunningly charming performance with an almost-tear-jerking emotional breakdown when confronted by his betrayed friend (Omar Epps). The climatic scene of the movie in which Sarandon’s character rejects a hurt and betrayed Alfie is intense and emotional; but falls remarkably short in the attempt to remain true to the original, using a line grossly irrelevant to its more modern remake.

Charles Shyer brings significant enhancements to the original film. His brilliant use of Charlie’s Angels-type mood-enhancing color guides you towards the emotional ideas, but cannot overcome the story’s inherent lack of follow-through.

The end result? A movie that looks great, actors that play their characters believably, and a story with so many dead end leads we are left wondering what the whole point of the last two hours was.

On the other hand, you do get a few good laughs, particularly when the too-strange-to-be-true penis doctor examines a very charmingly uncomfortable Alfie.

This is a film chickish enough for the girls and masculine enough for the guys, just don’t expect to see Hemmingway style character development - that element took an RDO the day Alfie put mug to lens.

3 out of 5

Alfie
Australian release: Thursday January 20th
Cast: Jude Law, Marisa Tomei, Omar Epps, NIA Long, Jane Krakowski, Sienna Miller, Susan Sarandon.
Director: Charles Shyer.
Website: Click here.

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