Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid

Review by Clint Morris

Explorers head to Borneo in Search of special flower. Their Boat is wonky, not even fit for the accompanying monkey. Giant Snake slithers beneath the water. First it scares the monkey, and then it jumps the passengers.

One by One, the crew either have to outsmart the Godzilla-esque Anaconda or accept their fate as that night's happy meal.

And that's about the extent of Dwight Little's ‘in-name-only’ sequel to the 1997 flick Anaconda (remember? It was the one where a giant snake tried to swallow Jennifer Lopez?).

To say much more about the near non-existent plot (it took four writers to pen this baby!), cardboard characters or Atari-game worthy special effects would spoil the film's one or two good moments.

Granted, director Little and the capable cast (Messner has the making of an action-hero of the future, whilst Strickland is as gorgeous as they come) do their best with the material on hand, but it's just not enough – there's only a couple of good jolts, and the rest of the time you're struggling to keep the eyelids open.

As for that snake – what a joke! Troma does better monsters.

On the other hand, if Little and those four screenwriters intended the film to be a satirical comedy, then they've succeeded – there's non-stop laughs here. From the hammy death scenes to the astoundingly awful dialogue, it plays like a SNL-esque skit. Frighteningly though…I suspect they all took it seriously.

Anacondas has its moments, but it just doesn't have enough bite to keep viewers entwined.

2 out of 5

Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid
Australian release: Thursday October 7th
Cast: Johnny Messner, KaDee Strickland, Morris Chesnut, Eugene Byrd, Matthew Marsden, Karl Yune, Salli Richardson, Nicholas Gonzales.
Director: Dwight Little.
Website: Click here.

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