Mashed : Web Wombat : Games

Loosely based upon the Micro Machines formula of racing tiny cars to the top of the screen before anyone else, Mashed is a party game, and a very addictive one at that.

It's got a level of accessibility and instantaneity that defies the modern trend, and for this it rocks hard, supplying jaded gamers such as myself with incredibly quick, rapid game time chock full of intensity.

But before I go any further, let me regale you with a little anecdote that flashed into my minds eye upon first hearing the name "Mashed".

I was instantly taken back to a caravan park in the South of France. I was five years old at the time, drinking watered down wine, eating baguettes by the basket full and generally enjoying life as most ankle biters do.

But as I was sitting in the middle of a round-a-bout, my testicles got "mashed" on the central bolt as it started to spin. Sure, 'tis an abrupt tale of woe few folk like to hear, but jeez, you should have heard the conversation come to a screeching halt as I told the story to the public relations people who were pushing the game. Yowser.

Okay, now that story time is over, let's detail what you can do in mashed: Not a lot.

But don't let the lack of options, cars, tracks, game modes and weapons fool you - this game is all about the gameplay, and even with one track and a broken control pad, it's still incredible fun. Essentially a racing game, Mashed tasks players to reach the top of the screen before all others, or at least eradicate them before they do away with you. In this manner you score points, and the first person to score a certain amount of points wins.

This can be achieved by a) knowing the tracks and racing like demon, b) nudging opponents off cliffs, or c) blowing the crap out of them with a number of delightfully violent car-mounted weapons.

The first two options are fairly straightforward, but the weapons need a little more explaining. There are three rearward deploying weapons, useful for slowing and/or annihilating your foes:

Oil Slick	An old favourite. Use this weapon to reduce the grip of foes. Tactically placed, you can wipe out the entire contingent of racers if placed near a cliff-top hairpin, for instance.
Barrels	You get two of these puppies for each pickup. They simply fire from your roof into the sky and explode in a really big way when they hit the ground, and are powerful enough to completely kill off opponents.
Proximity Mines	Very useful, very powerful, but they can also backfire if you're not careful. They have a 2 second arming delay, which sucks at times because you can't really drop them in your rivals face.
Flame Thrower	This is one a rearward only weapon, which is a somewhat odd choice. Strong enough to destroy one opponent if aimed well, plus an awesome weapon to have under your belt if you're in first place - the threat helps keep foes behind you.

There is also a range of forward firing weapons. Here they are:

Flash Bang	Not exactly forward or rearward firing, this is just like the FB grenades from Counter-Strike, and are useful for sending rivals off the road when sharp corners approach.
Mortar	An incredibly rewarding weapon if used correctly. Its firing arc makes aiming almost impossible, but hit an opponent and you'll be fist-pumping the air with glee.
Homing Missile	One of the most powerful and indeed deadly weapons in the game. Just like a Mario Kart red shell, these puppies home in on your opponents and have good tracking systems - very hard to outmanoeuvre. You also need to gain a lock for it to track a target, otherwise it will be dumb-fired forward.
Machine gun	Like the missile, you've got an infra-red tracking beam, and when it turns green, you can pummel your foes with bullets without missing. More of a gattling gun than a machine gun, it's the most common power-up along with oil slicks.
Shotgun	Lucky last - the shottie. This chirpy customer adheres to neither the fore nor rearward firing convention, instead discharging buck shot out from either side of your vehicle. A very tactical weapon that does more 'shove' and 'push' than physical damage, it is henceforth useful for sending opponents off the track and into the abyss.

Competitors can carry just one weapon at a time, but even with payload you can still drive through pickups, which benefiting you in no way whatsoever, will still mean the cars behind you miss out.

Generally speaking there are four players on the screen at once, although in the single player challenges this is not always the case, and you can have 1 vs 1 matches if you like. Bots, or CPU controlled cars can also be added in multiplayer games, which is a nice touch.

There's even traffic to spice things up

Apart from the racing, the bumping, the exploding and the falling off of cliffs, a number of different game modes can be unlocked by playing through the single-player campaign.

In addition to the already accessible Battle mode, these include Team Battle, Race, Beat the Bomb, Chase the Fugitive, Kill the Copter, Survival and Hold the Flag.

Having all these game modes improves the game's shelf life somewhat, but all in all, the gameplay is so tantalisingly more-ish, that this is one game that I won't be selling to Cash Convertors after I've revie... errr, renewed my faith in, um, Scientology. Yes, Scientology....

Graphically, the game is fairly basic. In fact it's not very pretty at all, but when the concept and execution is as good as this, you won't care.

In fact, even if it was in 2-dimensional, using parallax scrolling, plus scaling and rotating sprites, it'd still be a killer app. And on the plus side, the unsophisticated graphics result in short loading times.

The car's themselves are fairly basic in polygonal construction, but when you've been shot in the a$$ (thanks Mr. Florido!) with the machine gun a few times and there's flames cascading from your rear guards, you can't help but smile at the smaller details.

Viewed from top-down perspective most of the time, the camera is best described as dynamic as it will pan and zoom and do all sorts of trippy stuff that sucks to begin with, but after an hour or it adds a rather stylish aspect to proceedings, as by then you should be familiar with the tracks (which are fairly simplistic by and large - the first track is an oval).

The mortar in action

Part Mario Kart, part Micro Machines, part slot car racing and part Worms (with all the weapons), I first viewed Mashed with derision, such was its minimalism and lack of scope.

But play through a few levels, unlock a few tracks, then invite your mates around and you'll be rewarded with a no-nonsense, fast paced experience.

Though a lot of people will play the game and say "Will Barker, you're a damn fool!" it my personal belief that games such as this make us remember why we do this stuff, why we spend time glued to the screen, interacting and competing with our buddies: tip top gameplay.

If the Editor wasn't such a bloody 'mainstream' nazi I would've given the game at least 90%.

Still, at least I can rest easy in the knowledge that one day I'll have enough shiny coins to buy a muscle car with a roof-mounted minigun...

Whether you've got a PC, a PS2, or an Xbox, Mashed is a must have game in my humble opinion. It's dead easy to pick up - even for non-gamers - and can be played until the wee hours of night thanks to the competitive aspect. While the game may appear monotonous to passers by, it's anything but, and it is my personal goal to become a Grand Master at Mashed (complete with embroidered leather jacket).

It's games like Mashed that radiate a nostalgic air - they're simple concepts, with simple graphics and simple controls, yet the outcome is maddeningly addictive. Perhaps I'm getting too old for this at 23 years, but I love this sort of old-school stuff. Bring it on!

Game: Mashed
System: Xbox
Players: 1-4
Online: No
Developer: Empire Interactive / Supersonic
Distributor: Red Ant Enterprises

Rating: 80%

(Ratings Key/Explanation)

Mashed is on the shelves now.

	Announcement