Fatherhood - Me, a Dad!

By Aidden Williams

Becoming a Father

"You are joking - right?" Sitting across the kitchen table, having a hot coffee, I was told I was going to be a dad. 

Struck dumb, I was left speechless.

This was not something we had planned on.

First buy the house, then get married and finally a rug rat or two. Me - a dad! It was something I had to come to terms with and quickly. Obviously, there was no backing out now that I was committed.

How do I tell my mates that I am going to be a dad? What were they going to think?

I ended up playing pool at the local hotel with the guys and told them then. Some were extremely surprised; others just thumped me on the back and brought me a beer.

"There goes the weekends and footy finals, the end of your freedom."

"Enjoy your sleep while you can, because you won't get much of it when the baby comes home."

"Organise a baby-sitter - never know when you will need one."

"Prepare to spend your money - my missus spent heaps of mine on our kids."

"Enjoy your time as a couple because that all changes when the kids come along."

Everyone had a comment or two to make about me becoming a dad. Ryan pulled me aside for a quiet word: "Aidden, man when you have a family everything changes. My wife and I grew closer because of our kids. Being a dad is the most serious job I have ever done.

"You know, these little people, they look up to you to for everything. Anything you do they will copy - I know. My eldest girl learnt to swear from me and boy, did my missus go crook at me. Seriously bud, you will love it - it's a new world!"

Throughout the next nine months, I constantly remembered what Ryan said. My partner and her moods - a cyclone was more predictable. Constantly, I had to reassure that she wasn't fat and just having a baby, that she was still beautiful to me.

Food cravings? I shudder to remember. As the time got closer for our baby to be born, we both got excited. I am so glad that as a man we don't have to go through that pain. Yes, I know that sounds selfish - sad but true.

In hospital I thought my hand would be squeezed into tiny fragments and my head hurt. And all this was nothing compared to my partner; it amazed me how strong she could be.

In time our son was born with ten toes and fingers. Yep, they were all there and a healthy set of lungs too. Within a short time he was squealing, wanting a feed from his mum. When I was handed our little man I could not describe in words how I felt. When I first held him, he looked a bit like a prune, all shrivelled up. The first moments we shared as a family, I'll never forget.

Now that every has settled in somewhat, I realise that I am a dad. After we brought our tiny son into our home, the reality well and truly set in: the sleepless nights, foul smelling nappies, extra washing, taking turns feeding and bathing him... It's incredibly tough. But when he first smiled at me, all of the tiredness just disappeared. It was amazing, like looking at myself anew.

My mates were right about a lot of the things they said at the hotel. My lifestyle has changed and I occasionally go and watch the football or go to the local for a quiet one. I sometimes miss being in a relationship as a couple, as my wife is so involved with the baby.

For all of the changes though, I would not miss being a dad for anything in this world. Something I recommend wholeheartedly and not to be missed.