Keeping the Flame Alive

By Siana Scatti

Come spring, summer or even the depths of winter, canoodlers are everywhere you go.

Mashing their teeth together in public places with not a care for anything but who is in their arms.

It always brings a smile and memories flood back about the thrill of the first date with a new partner or lover.

The heady adrenalin rush of romance is one of the great things in life and while it makes concentration on more serious aspects of existence - like work and eating - tough, it lifts the soul for the all-too-short time it exists.

While romance is exciting, it is eroded over time by the increasing intrusion of real life and the need to work, pay the bills, and even the fact that your lover begins to lose that mystique as you really get to know them up close and personal.

So, how to keep the precious flame alive and avoid that descent in a relationship that can lead to divorce?

If you don't think marriage needs a bit of work then you are in for a big surprise - for there are some truly astonishing facts and figures floating around on the subject of divorce in Australia.

E-mail us your ideas on how people can keep their marriage fresh and alive.

Some suggestions to keep the flame alive:

Kiss Goodbye or Hello
Heading off to work with a kiss is just a nice way to start the day - whether you are the one leaving or the partner staying home to be with the children. Walking in the door at night - or greeting the person returning - can be a boost for both.

Physical Contact
A cuddle silently speaks wonders and the warmth of your partner's arms can be a great help if you're stressed or need a bit of reassurance. A bit of advice, though, try not to be an eternal cuddler at inopportune or unexpected moments (whoops) like when your partner is peeling the potatoes, trying to work or carrying a hot drink.

Staying in Shape
This is important because it lets your partner know that you still care enough about them to remain fit and attractive just for them.

Enforced Celibacy
Not a great fan of this one, but in some societies sex is off-limits for large parts of a month but, when it occurs, the stars explode. NB: People with babies or young children can probably get a good idea of what it's like.

Never sleep on a Dispute
Even after 10 years of marriage this is still a toughy. It is sensible, right, and allows you both to get a good night's sleep, but actually achieving it may be for saints.

Love Talk
Tell your partner at least once a day that you love them - and mean it.

Be Considerate
Don't forget that your work - whether in an office or at home - is not the only hard graft going around. Your partner also is working hard. It's good form to ask how their day was before launching into your own story.