Are you a Rules girl?
By JENELLE CLEARY
 Are
you a girl that is just waiting for Prince Charming to kneel
down, present you with a perfect red rose (complete with water
drops on the petals) and utter the words "Will you marry me?"
Well then, do I have the book for you - The
Rules , a US phenomenon.
Groups of girls out there - all with marriage on the mind
- are joining forces and following the commandments outlined
in the book The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider.
It is like a secret girl group. With rules set in place such
as "Never, ever call him", "Never accept a Saturday date after
Wednesday" and "Always end a date first" these call for a
lot of self-discipline.
Maybe it is a good thing for those of us who enjoy the odd
challenge but be warned: you will deserve a medal if you make
it through.
Even if you don't wish to follow The Rules, this book
will give you an interesting insight to the little things
that supposedly have guys grovelling for more. It is all about
mind games and the thrill (!) of the chase.
Imagine you have been staring at the phone for three hours
just waiting for him to call. When the phone finally rings,
The Rules state that you let it go through to the machine
because you don't want to make it seem as if you were waiting
to hear his voice! It is a way of becoming aware of your own
actions and how they can implicate situations. How you
can be in charge.
For me, there is too much effort involved and too much to
remember to become a Rules girl. If you find it hard to stick
to the basic rules of society such as, single file when on
an escalator, then these rules will be a challenge!
Some of them make day-to-day living very hard and well,
totally unrealistic! For example, the "Never talk on the phone
to him for more than 10 minutes" rule. What?
What happens when you finally do get married? He, all of
a sudden, finds out that you don't have a 10-minute time limit
when talking to him! This means sacrificing your weakness
for inane chatter to impress. That alone ruled out this thing
ever working for me!
Still, The Rules is great fun and well, if it works
for you, then it is an added bonus.
Girls have been said to have married within a year after
following The Rules. (How did they find a reception
centre free?)
While we can sit and debate the pros and cons of such literature,
many women see The Rules as a chance to call the shots!
As the title suggests, it is all about capturing the heart
of Mr Right. (What happens to us if he isn't Mr Right?)
The feminist debate has been running wild but it's not just
marriage-obsessed women who are reading this book. Even men
are reading it to try to learn in advance how to play the
game.
The writers say they receive hundreds of letters and e-mails
each week from girls who follow the book and claim success.
It is surprising to note that many girls find The Rules
don't necessarily lead to their walking down the aisle, but
at least give them a confidence-booster, shore up their self-esteem
and give them strength and trust in themselves to make decisions.
If I had the patience, I would certainly love this book to
work. We all would. But I'm a sucker for calling at the wrong
time, saying what I want and talking too much.
That's the fun of it all and if we never did anything wrong
in relationships then Tim-Tams would never have pride of place
in all of our cupboards.
The Rules II has now been released with more secrets
and rules to keep you going. You can also get instructional
cassettes or have the authors consult you on your relationship
woes.
By the way, as a rule-breaker, it may be interesting to note
that I am still single…
Links
The
Rules
The
Rules for Guys
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